is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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