he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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