"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
