Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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