i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
