I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Randomize
