lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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