just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
You took a bar mat shot.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
