We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
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