dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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