this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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