I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
