Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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