But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
