Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
