Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
