mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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