well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize