And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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