My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
