So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
3 2 1 whiskey
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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