i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize