Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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