the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
