girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
