Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
