i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
