Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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