HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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