True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
