Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
