You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Will you blow on my dice?
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
