good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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