White coat. Heels.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize
