I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
