you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize