I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
