I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
