Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
