new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Sext me about skeletons
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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