There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
