you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
