Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I could have mohawked her pubes.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
