I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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