you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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