I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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