last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
