some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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