No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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