I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
